I like my parenting book, Secrets of Safety-Net Parenting, but that doesn't mean that I don't appreciate other books that help me as a dad. This summer I read Duct Tape Parenting by Vicki Hoefle. I really liked a lot of what she wrote about in her book. I wanted to implement some of her ideas and strategies right away, but I didn't want to do it without buy-in from my wife, Mary. So, I gave her the book and asked her to read it so we could start the duct-tape process.
Mary finally finished the book. We talked about our plan of action, and decided to implement it in December.
Today is the first of December, so we have begun. Now, I am not an expert in Hoefle's techniques, but if we understand correct, we are to start with this five-day experiment. We told our daughters about it, and now we're off to the races.
So, this five-day experiment is Mary and me putting duct tape over our mouths (figuratively... at least for the first couple of days), and we don't remind the girls to do what they are expected to do. We don't clean up after them. We don't do what they are supposed to. All we do is observe, take notes and keep our mouths shut.
What's the point? According to our interpretation of the book, it's to categorize what our girls can't do, can do (but aren't willing to), and can (and are willing to) do. Once armed with this information, we are to share it with our girls, let them know that our job is to get them ready for the real world by the time they are eighteen, and ask them which of the things they won't or can't do they want to start working on.
We'll cross that bridge when we get there. For now, we just need to get through the next five days. Does that mean we may end up with a pile of dishes, eating off paper plates? Could be. Does that mean we may have to wade through piles of dirty socks and sweatshirts? Quite possibly. But, it's part of the process.
Keeping our fingers crossed and our mouths shut. Wish us luck. I'll keep you posted on how it goes.
image courtesy of ©MorgueFile.com/cyblor
Mary finally finished the book. We talked about our plan of action, and decided to implement it in December.
Today is the first of December, so we have begun. Now, I am not an expert in Hoefle's techniques, but if we understand correct, we are to start with this five-day experiment. We told our daughters about it, and now we're off to the races.
So, this five-day experiment is Mary and me putting duct tape over our mouths (figuratively... at least for the first couple of days), and we don't remind the girls to do what they are expected to do. We don't clean up after them. We don't do what they are supposed to. All we do is observe, take notes and keep our mouths shut.
What's the point? According to our interpretation of the book, it's to categorize what our girls can't do, can do (but aren't willing to), and can (and are willing to) do. Once armed with this information, we are to share it with our girls, let them know that our job is to get them ready for the real world by the time they are eighteen, and ask them which of the things they won't or can't do they want to start working on.
We'll cross that bridge when we get there. For now, we just need to get through the next five days. Does that mean we may end up with a pile of dishes, eating off paper plates? Could be. Does that mean we may have to wade through piles of dirty socks and sweatshirts? Quite possibly. But, it's part of the process.
Keeping our fingers crossed and our mouths shut. Wish us luck. I'll keep you posted on how it goes.
image courtesy of ©MorgueFile.com/cyblor
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